Thursday, December 3, 2009

Defining Selfish

If I can recognize that I'm a better Mommy because my kids are in school certain hours, does that make me self-ish or self-aware?

We had a great Thanksgiving Break.  All 5.5 days of it, but who's counting?  And as of yesterday morning, Youngest hadn't been at school for 11 days (including weekends).  She goes W/Th/F and when Thanksgiving Break starts on Tuesday afternoon, that means she has a whole week off, doesn't it?

Interesting that when I was growing up (you really DO talk about the good old days when you get to a certain age, don't you?), we didn't have 5.5 days off, we had 4 - Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.

Monday was Oldest's first day back in 5.5 days and yesterday was Youngest's first day back in 11 days. 

Oh bliss.  I showered.  Went to the post office and bank.  Alone.  Chipped away at that 31 item "to do" list - which actually grew to 43 by the time I started on it.  Listened to . . . silence.  Bliss I say.

I admire home schoolers and get to see it first-hand - I have one in my family.  But me?  I need, need those hours (even when it's only 2 hours) to collect myself and feel like I am the master of my ship. 

And I'm pretty darn sure they need it too.  Once kids get to a certain age (IMO that is 2 years old), they need more social stimulation than "Mommy or Daddy."  We are still important, essential characters in their life story, but socialization is practically as basic a human need as food, clothing and shelter.

Why else would I have started this blog, joined Facebook and Twitter?  Because of the need to connect with others.  To feel heard.

So to get back to my original question today - I choose self-aware.  I want to believe it's not selfish to need this time "off" in the morning from them as much as they need to be away from me in order to grow and develop.  It makes us all better at our jobs.  Me - Mom.  Them - kids. 

And I'm SO self-aware, mind you, that I can recognize how badly I need my hair done.  THAT'S on tap for this morning's 2 hours "off" while Youngest is at school.

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